Tag: TheFatGuy

Living the life, I deserve!

I had such a hard time thinking about living the life I deserved in 2009. Just as importantly was me living the life Polly, my wife, deserved. I’ve always been great at helping others, which I Iove, just not so great with taking care of me. I am sure some of you can identify with me.

Actually, understanding that living the life I deserved was important was a huge deal for me. I had always been good at being in the background, supporting others, helping others find success, and making things happen that way. I am not complaining, it is something I am quite good at and take pride in then and now.

At the Ports Authority and Boys & Girls Clubs, I thrived at helping those that worked with me and for me find success in what they were doing and wanted to do. That is how I built successful operations. Each person was part of the overall success.

In my volunteer work I was always ‘Johnny on the spot’. I always showed up, always, said YES, and always made things happen to bring success to the project or organization.

Both my careers and volunteer work were and are very important to me. But for too many years they came at a toll. I gave up far too much of myself and my life. At some point at started sacrificing too much of me, too much of I wanted to be in life. I found myself helping others live the life they deserved while coming up short on living the life I deserved.

When I would do things to take care of me and pursue my personal goals/dreams, I felt almost guilty for focusing on my wellbeing. I felt that if I took time for me, I was taking away from someone else, the project, or organization. I developed a warped sense of thinking over time.

It took me almost 53 years of life to figure out I needed to ‘Take Care of ME’ to be the best me for everyone else in my life. I realized in 2009 that I had no more to give and my tank was empty. In 2009 I started working on living the life Polly and I deserved.

It has taken me a number of years to come to grips with the fact that living the life I deserve not only helps me, it helps a lot of other people, too. I am a much better me to help my family, friends, and community. I am in so much of a better place now with my health, wellness, and mindset. I am working toward ‘living the life I deserve’ AND I am bringing people with me on the journey. I LOVE THAT ABOUT ME! And, I have found it is OK to love me! If you don’t love YOU, learn too!!

I have gone from a fatguy that took care of everyone but himself, to a person that is becoming a beast about taking care of himself! Being a beast is a mindset I have developed and continue to work on to best take care of me. And by being a beast about taking care of me, I’ve found that I am much better at helping others in my life. I am much better at being a husband, son, brother, friend, and volunteer. I am much better at helping people live the lives they deserve!

Note to ME and YOU: Could a better version of YOU be a bad thing? I think not! Live the life YOU deserve and be a BEAST about it!

thefatguy-thefitguy-thebeast.com

15 March, 2018
My ‘why’ has gotten bigger!

My ‘why’ has gotten bigger!

I WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE combating our obesity epidemic!

My passion is to be healthy, fit, and strong enough to best help my family, friends, and community. It is my ‘why’ and it keeps me moving forward on my journey through all the highs and lows I experience. I have worked on this for the past 8 ½ years. I am not perfect, but I am in a much better place to pursue my passion and live my ‘why’.

Now, my ‘why’ is expanding! I want to change the obesity epidemic that plagues our country. With a third of our country obese and another third headed that way, I must do something! I want to sound the alarm! I want to wake people up! I want to turn the tide on this cursed epidemic that has become our health care crisis. It is truly a disaster!

WHY? Because I have found my way out of my own personal fire and want to lead others out of their fire!

I help people by coaching, nutrition support, giving away my story at fatguydiary.com, and volunteering with organizations, such as, Eat Smart Move More Charleston Tri-County. But, I feel this is not near enough for me. I have a burning desire to make a bigger difference! Bu how?

I just finished a project that was published this month called “A Journey of Riches Personal Changes”. My contribution was a section titled “Hopeless to Amazed”. I wrote “Hopeless to Amazed” by digging deeper on my journey and because I see so many people that feel they are hopeless to change their lives, change their destiny. I want people to know they CAN change their life, they CAN change their destiny!

My starting point is simple. I am doing more speaking engagements starting October 20^th and I am working on a grocery store guide with Eat Smart Move More CTC. I am looking for more opportunities to sound the alarm and give people the hope they need to start their journeys.

I am also excited to say I am embarking on a new writing project that I have been working on since early August. A chance meeting, has brought me together with someone that is giving me the opportunity to have a bigger voice to help give people some hope and direction out of obesity and unhealthy lifestyle toward a healthier happier future. This news will be coming soon!!!!

Note to ME and YOU: It is going to take ALL of us to turn our obesity epidemic around! Let’s do it!

9 October, 2017
Frustrated, Angry, Confused?

Frustrated, Angry, Confused? I was.

Two things happened today that really hit home with me. First, I had a friend post that Americans spend $65 billion a year on the weight loss industry, despite a 95% failure rate. Second, I invested a hour coaching someone today that was frustrated, angry, and confused!

I get it because I’ve been there. The frustration and anger, with a dose of confusion, I saw today is all too common. Today was a prime example of what happens to people. My client has tried multiple programs seen success to some level on each and then returned to old habits. His level of anger, frustration, and confusion stemmed from the fact that he is very successful in his career and life overall. He is able to multitask and accomplish many things in life. He is extremely frustrated because he can’t make this lifestyle change work. He wants his habits to change now, but is not ready to stick with new lifestyle habits more than a few days or a week to get where he wants to go.

I know this situation and lived it. I’m great at helping others, was great at helping two organizations find success, love helping my church, and enjoy volunteering to help local nonprofits and schools. I was not great at taking care of me! I saw this level of frustration in me and see it when I speak to groups, have one on one discussions, and in the media.

I can help, I know I can help! I have the programs and have traveled the journey. I know what it is like to fall and keep getting up each time I fall. BUT, this comes down to one thing. That one thing is YOU! Are YOU ready to change? Just how committed are YOU to changing on a scale from 1-10? What is your WHY for changing? Is your WHY important enough to YOU to stay committed to your lifestyle change?

As my client and I parted, I told him to Keep it Simple, not to beat himself up anymore, and not to think about cheat days or anything else till we got his habits working. He promised to follow our plan through Sunday and then we will regroup!

My advice to you is don’t beat yourself up anymore, and commit today to your journey. Always get up right away when you fall. Keep things as simple as possible to change your lifestyle habits. AND, if you are committed and ready, contact me and let’s get you in a healthy lifestyle. YOU ARE WORTH IT!!

Note to ME and YOU: We are worth the effort. And always, Take Care of YOU!

2 August, 2017
CIRCUMSTANCES

Circumstances

I did a Facebook post the other day about Managing Circumstances! In this picture you will see me icing my neck and shoulder. They are the result of a car accident 2 years ago and a very long story. When I made the post, I was not expecting prayers and good thoughts, but I thank everyone for them! My focus was my circumstance and dealing with it. You see many times in life I have given into my circumstance. I know it is a road many of us go down in our life. Circumstances can often be overwhelming.

At this point I would like to bring your focus to some of the inspiration I have in my life that teach me how to deal with tough circumstances. First, my dad is a great inspiration to me. He lost his partner in life (my mom) after 60 years just 2 short years ago. It is a very difficult circumstance. I know his heart hurts every day from the loss, I see it. How does he deal with it? He relies on prayer, God, family, and love. He is the best dad and granddad I know.

Another person is a good friend of mine. He is caring for his mom and mother in-law. He is raising a lovely teenager, works in the community, helps others, and works to share time with his wonderful wife. And, did I mention, he has dealt with retinoblastoma and the after effects of managing that horrible disease. He does an amazing job managing his ‘circumstances’! You will not know his circumstances because he rarely shares them outside of a select group, but he is amazing.

Then there is an entire group of people that are game changers for me. I’ve been watching, loving, and been part of the lives on countless children and teens over the past 31 years. The wonderful young people of Camp Kemo are all dealing with some form of cancer or blood disorder. They are dealing with ‘circumstances’ I wish on no young person. They are dealing with hospital visits, all kinds of treatment, weight gain, weight loss, hair loss, changing relationships with their peers that have no idea how to deal with them and their disease, and yes, death. They are traveling a very tough road with tough ‘circumstances’. And how do they deal with their circumstances? They laugh, smile, cheer for one another, share, care, dance, cry, hug, and overcome. I have watched them overcome their ‘circumstances’ for many years.

These young people, my friend, my dad, and many others in life have taught me that circumstances do not define the person. Circumstances can be tough, they put much pressure on people in their life’s journey. I am thankful that I have many examples of people in my life that have seen the tremendous pressure of ‘circumstances’. How they have managed their circumstances and dealt with the pressure has created many jewels for me to look to for hope and guidance in dealing with my circumstances.

I never question or compare people’s circumstances. What I do know is I have many examples of people in my life that have managed and overcome some circumstances that seemed impossible to work through. They were steering at a solid wall of circumstances and brick by brick removed the wall to continue on an even greater journey.

Note to ME and YOU:

Your circumstances are not YOU!

YOU are a product of YOUR Decisions!

TheFatGuy

TheFitGuy

TheBEAST

2 June, 2017
61 and not close to DONE!!
61 and not close to DONE!!

(Pay It Forward Today!!)

Today I am 61 and I am not close to done. 8 years ago I thought I was done. I was old, unhealthy, obese, and generally miserable.

Today I am blessed.
- I am blessed to be fit!
- I am blessed to continue on my journey in spite of 2 years of working to manage pain.
- I am blessed to be as healthy as I’ve been in my life!
- I am blessed to have a second chance! (it’s probably a lot more than second!)
- I am blessed to be helping others find their weight loss and wellness journeys!
- I am just plain BLESSED!
The feeling of having released 150 pounds 7 years ago is amazing. Losing it and learning to manage my weight, health, and wellness has been a great experience and one I will embrace the rest of my life. What is hard to convey to you is just how much my quality of life has changed. The best way I can explain it is to take a look at my before and after pics, multiply by 4 and that is how much better I feel! That is how much my quality of life has improved!

I work to let people know just how much I have changed. I work to let people know they can change too! Sometimes when you are struggling with weight and its effects on your life, you just don’t think you can make the change; you just feel hopeless. I promise you, I felt hopeless at 360 pounds and now I feel amazed. I know if I can do it, if I can commit to the journey, that you can do it too!

If I can help you, please let me know. You can HELP ME! Check out my Facebook page and Pay It Forward today. That is all I want for my birthday. All I want is for people to do at least one random act of kindness and Comment Done on my Facebook post.

Note to ME and YOU: You can always change. There is always hope to change. There is no time like NOW! Also, a random act of kindness will help you more than the person you help J

TheFatGuy

TheFitGuy

TheBEAST
19 May, 2017
A message from my wife about my obesity

Below is a message from my wonderful wife, Polly, which is the lead into my story which I give away on my website. It will give you a small idea of how my obesity impacted the love of my life.

A message from TheFatGuy’s wife, POLLY:

Just how big are you going to get…

After Michael left his non-profit job, he just sat around getting bigger and bigger and more and more depressed. He was struggling with ending a dream of working with a children’s non-profit and it was killing him. He was also struggling with how he would start over as a 360+ pound, 50+ year old man in a society that is so geared to the young and pretty.

He self-medicated with food…all kinds of food: ice cream, candy, chips, soda. And he often ate after eating. Remember the pre-barbecue scene in Gone With the Wind where Scarlett had to eat before the party so she ate like a lady at the party? Well, Michael would leave a family reunion where there was tons of food and he had eaten a huge meal and stop at the convenience store for candy and a coke to make the trip home. And not just one item but several: junior mints, Mike and Ikes, jelly beans, milk duds.

Or he would buy a 100 count box of Freeze Pops and bring 6 or 8 to bed and eat them while we were watching TV. And I would cringe as he ate them and I would feel pissed when I threw the wrappers in the trash. But I never said anything because we didn’t discuss the elephant in the room. I remember feeling desperate and angry.

At one point, I became overwhelmed and frustrated with his self destructive behavior. I remember going to work one morning and telling my friend Missee, “I’m going to ask Michael, “Just how big are you going to get?” Her eyes got really big and she said, “Maybe you should put that in a letter.”

Well, I never wrote the letter or had the conversation, but my vibe must have been strong…because in early March of 2009, Michael started on a health journey that continues to this day.

(Note: TheFatGuy was dramatically impacting the person HE loved most!)

16 March, 2017
I AM BLESSED

I was struck yesterday by the thought of just how blessed I am in life. I know I am blessed and I thank God daily for my blessings.

What was different about yesterday? Why did it ‘strike’ me suddenly? I have seen a number of my contemporaries pass over the last few years and in particular this year. Some were friends, some friends of friends, past co-workers, friends of my wife, some family (my brother in-law) and parents of younger friends/relatives. It all seemed to come together as I looked at that old picture of me at 360 pounds (the one I keep to remind me of where I was, and where I will not go back to) and thought of a cousin that lost her dad several years ago.

I don’t know why my mind works the way it does, but a wave of thoughts and emotion came across me. I thought about how bad a shape I was in at 53 years old. I thought about how many people I’ve known in my age range that I/we have lost recently and over the years since finding my journey. I thought about my younger cousin and other younger friends I know that have lost parents that are my age. I thought about life, problems, pettiness, and sadness. We get so caught up in the small things in life that we do not enjoy the people we have when we have them.

The emotion that came crashing down on me was focused around the realization that I could be gone now, that I would be gone now if not for that moment of clarity in 2009, that AHA moment created by the Fire Story my wife told me. How lucky was I? Why me? And then I thought about those younger people that lost their parents much too soon. They were my age and I don’t think of my age as old. Why them? Why have we lost them so soon?

I caught my breath, sat there, and thought for a moment. I thought ‘I AM BLESSED’. Then I thanked God for my blessings and prayed for those that passed much too soon and those they left behind.

I also thought about how I was on my way out in 2009 and how I am nowhere near that now. I was able to start my journey to healthier happier me. I was able to control my destiny. How many people get that opportunity? How many people think they are done when they may be able to change their present and future? I meet people every day that could gain that control. They feel too far gone or hopeless, but they are not. I pray these people find their moment of clarity and realize they can change and can create a journey to a healthier happier you. I know this is true because I was them in 2009. I was too far gone and hopeless. I AM TRULY BLESSED.

If I can help YOU, let me know.

Note to ME and YOU: Pray for that moment of clarity, that AHA Moment, that gets you to the healthier happier you. I pray daily for this for ME and YOU.

TheFatGuy

TheFitGuy

The BEAST

30 September, 2016
Transformation
I’ve been blessed to see major transformation in my life, help others to find transformation in their lives, and help organizations transform.

What do all of these transformations have in common? Commitment, vision, knowledge, energy, and a can-do attitude!
- Commitment to the transformation is key. In each case people fully committed to make a change, and in some cases a radical change. If you do not commit, then no other steps matter.
- Vision toward where you needed to go was also a common thread in these journeys. People developed a vision and started down the road toward that vision
- Knowledge was gathered along the way to travel the roads toward the vision. Knowledge about self and knowledge about the task at hand were key pieces to each transformation.
- Energy is seen in each instance. People develop a certain energy to move toward transformation and they harness that energy to get where they need to go.
- A Can-Do attitude is needed to make the transformation happen. Yes a positive Can-Do attitude can get you a long way down the road to transformation! As TheFatGuy says, you choose your attitude each day regardless of your life circumstances. You will make good, sometimes great life choices with a positive attitude.
You should know that YOU can transform your life at anytime! I have been blessed to have it happen in my life and blessed to see it happen in many other lives and situations.

Note to ME and YOU: Transformation can get you from where you don’t want to be to where you dream to go!

TheFatGuy

TheFitGuy

TheBEAST
26 April, 2016
April Fool! (Who ME?)

As I look back, I can see that many days, if not most, were April Fool’s Day for me! I fooled myself for many days and many years.

How did I do this? I did this by ignoring me, ignoring my own weight, health, fitness, and life. I was pretty good at helping others and not so good at helping ME. I Fooled myself into ignoring these things. I immersed myself in the needs of others, thinking that if I took time for me I would be taking away from my efforts for others.

I went from 300 pounds to over 360 pounds in 3 ½ years working to save a non-profit I felt passion for and helping youth I wanted so much to help succeed in life. I did immerse myself in the organization and the needs of others during this period of time. I worked 70 hour weeks for 3 ½ years to save this organization and did nothing much of anything else. I failed to do many of the things that helped me through life. I failed to properly embrace family and friends. I failed to manage my own life. I failed to create balance in my life. I completely failed to “ Take Care of ME!”

While I may have done much good for the youth I served over 3 ½ years, I took major hits in health, fitness, body, mind, and soul. I did nothing to “Take Care of ME”. I do not tell you this to feel like I sacrificed so much for others, or for some altruistic feeling this might give me. I like helping others, it’s what I am good at in life. I was actually disappointed in me. When I started my journey and looked at what I did, why I did it, and what I wanted to do, I realized just how much I was fooling me.

I was not only fooling me, I was cheating myself of the ability to be the best me for me and others I my life. Ultimately I ended up at a point where I was in such bad shape, I was no longer able to help others the way I wanted and it was not a good place to be. SO on March 2, 2009 I realized that I needed to be the best me for me and to best help others in my life. I know and talk to many people that are great at helping others and not so great at helping themselves. I see it all too often.

I have to remind myself every day that to be the best me for me and everyone else in my life, I have to “Take Care of ME!” It is not a selfish thing, it is the best thing for all.

Note to ME and YOU: Don’t be an April Fool and Fool yourself. “Take Care of YOU” so You can be the best YOU for all!

1 April, 2016
7 Years on My Journey! WOW!
7 Years on My Journey! WOW!

Me at 342 on my weigh to losing 150!

Yep, on March 2, 2009 I officially started my journey! I weighed 351 pounds that day and was over 360 pounds in early February of that year. I was a mess! The weight came with 7 meds, a CPAP machine, multiple ailments, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and so on. Life was not good, not fun, and I was helping no one, most of all myself.

On that date I committed to ‘taking care of ME’. In my very first log entry the morning of that day I included this statement: “I need to take care of me so I can best help my family and community.” You see, I was not good at ‘taking care of ME’ so I could not help others the way I wanted to, the way I needed to help them. That is why I wrote “Fat Guy Diary: Out of the Fire!” I was not able to find my way out of my own personal fire, so I could not help anyone else find their way. I could not take care of ME so how was I going to help anyone else. I give my story away because I feel so blessed to have found my journey and see so many that need to start their journeys, that want to start their journeys. .

Back to the journey. I lost 150 pounds in 363 days. I have challenged myself in many ways since and have been able to do many things I never thought possible. Things like:

150 Reps!
- Coming off of the 7 meds
- Doing away with the CPAP machine
- Doing 150 reps of the stands at Stoney Field
- Doing 493 pushups in 30 minutes in a fundraiser
- Appearing on a Total Gym infomercial
- And more that I can list here…..
It has not always been easy. I have worked hard to establish better lifestyle habits over the past 7 years. BUT, during stressful times the almost 53 years of bad lifestyle habits creep in or other times, come screaming back. The biggest spikes have come when I have lost a loved one from my life. I’ve lost my father in-law, mother in-law, mom, and last week, my brother in-law. I can deal with most things, but these life events really impact my life. I am all about family so this makes sense. It also makes sense that I need to continue to work on my newer, better habits. This is very important.

It is important because I would have not made it through these times if I was not in shape and healthy. I would have not been able to help my family, if I was not taking care of ME. My family deserves the best ME to be there for them, I deserve the best ME to be there for ME. As I continue to set my habits in ‘stone’ it will make it much easier and better for me to help my family and others the way I want and need to help them. IT IS ALL ABOUT THE HABITS, THE HEALTHY HABITS.

The more habitual I make healthy choices the better off I am. The more habitual I make eating smart and moving more the better off I will be.

Note to ME and YOU: Good Habits and Good Choices lead to a Good Life, a Better You, a Healthy You!

Mike, TheFatGuy

PS The best way I know to honor those that have gone before me is to take care of ME and help others
2 March, 2016

Tag: TheFatGuy

7 Years on My Journey! WOW!